Universitale Pictures has great expectations for its newest release, now in production. With box-office receipts declining since the nation fell for television, studios are scrambling to lure people back to the theaters.
Universitale’s hopes rest on reuniting a trio of horror stalwarts who packed houses through the ’30s and ’40s.
But in 1950, will anyone still be frightened by Boris Kissoff lumbering as the Rankenstein Monster? Did audiences ever truly tremble when Ron Cheyney, Jr. snorted and growled his way through the Woofman series? And in the modern age, who will shudder when Bela Lagrossi unburies his Count Dragula?
This reporter suggests Universitale could save a bundle by dropping the former stars and releasing a thriller with only the Invisible Man… and his evil twin.
Meanwhile, Hollywood expects a visit from Congressman Beauregard “Foghorn” Jackson IV and his secretary, Miss Honeydew Thistlewhistle. The Congressman promises a startling revelation about certain very famous movie stars.
